Last Christmas
by foreveraddicted
Summary: Second chances at life are few and far between. Never hoping but always yearning, Bella wants to give herself and her son a Christmas gift that she never dreamed they could have.
1. Lessons Learned

**Hey Guys! I know what you are thinking...why are you writing a Christmas story when you should be working on The Hole Shot! Yes, you are right, but I couldn't help myself!**

**I haven't had this beta, I wanted to give Moma T a break, _so_ all mistakes are so mine.**

**I don't own, but I bet you knew that already.**

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You never really understand your parents when they throw all those rules at you during those rebellious teenage years. You listen, you pretend to obey...and then you run off and do whatever the hell you want. I, Isabella Swan, learned my lesson. I actually learned it pretty quickly when I found myself 19 and pregnant.

Let me rewind a little bit here. I grew up in a sleepy little Washington town that no one has ever heard of. I can't say that I blame them; there are literally 3 stop lights to the whole place. My dad, Charlie, is a police officer there and mom is an accountant. My mom had a lot of trouble during childbirth, so it's always just been me.

My childhood was pretty great, I can't deny that. My parents were always loving and kind and in all honesty, they probably made things a little too easy on me. But that's life isn't it? Only children quite often find themselves on the spoiled side. So, when I found myself being called Miss Vanilla at 17, I decided I wanted to change.

Enter Alec Hale.

He was every girl's wet dream. Tall, lean and tattooed with 'kiss my ass' attitude, I was quickly drawn to his boyish charm and square jaw which made me want to lick him. The biggest turn on?

He. Wanted. _Me_.

He was 18, and in my eyes, that made him a man. Soon, the subtle brushes and glances that the boys in my grade gave just weren't enough. Alec seemed bold with his blatant ogling and strong sexual remarks. I wish I could seem embarrassed at how quickly I found myself underneath him, but I wasn't. He made me feel loved and beautiful and wild.

I loved every second of it.

My parents were livid. Alec had dropped out of school, he had no prospects of a job, and he lived in a run-down apartment with three other guys. While I never partook in any of the snowflakes that were left on the kitchen table, I know that Alec did. It was a source of many fights over the course of our relationship.

He would use; we would fight. He would use; we would fight. It was a vicious cycle that I couldn't seem to break away from.

After going back and forth for a year, I quickly found out that the pull and pray method isn't the most effective form of birth control. The day I went to the apartment to tell Alec, he wasn't alone.

The door was slightly ajar, and I had gone in without knocking before. I didn't expect this time to be any different, so I pushed the door open and walked in. At this point, I had only ever been intimate with Alec, and while I wasn't exactly 'dead' in bed, I knew that there were other things out there than the simple lovemaking we had been doing. I just wasn't prepared to see those other things from my boyfriend...and another girl...and guy.

As Alec pumped into her from behind, and his roommate thrust up into her simultaneously, I nearly vomited on the spot.

I thought he jump away, ashamed, and beg for my forgiveness. He didn't. Instead, he smirked at me and motioned for me to join them.

I was young and naive and my world had been turned upside down. I did the only thing I could think of; I ran. I didn't know what else to do. I waited every night for a phone call. Nothing. A week later, Alec finally showed up outside of school and asked me what my problem was. When I told him about the baby, he laughed.

"Whose is it? Cause it sure as hell isn't mine."

Those were words that would echo in my brain and haunt me for the remainder of my pregnancy. It wasn't until I held my baby boy in my arms that I vowed then and there, he came first. Always.

Life was tough, but my parents were incredible. I can't count how many nights I have lay awake in my bed and cried tears of remorse for them and everything I had put them through. They didn't have to stand by me when the whispers of the town came. They stood their ground and defended their 'slut' daughter. They didn't have to help me when I needed diapers and baby food, but they bought them anyway. They certainly didn't have to help me when I had finals to take and senior seminar to pass...but they did.

I owe everything to them. That includes this little bookstore that I'm standing in now.

They sold all their stock and bonds _and_ took out a second mortgage on their house to help me create my little empire. Okay, so empire is probably not the right word, but after the first year, it became pretty obvious that print was dying, and that I would have to expand if I wanted to keep the doors open.

I started small. Rosalie McCarty and her husband Emmett had been friends of mine since college. Sweet and good natured, I was more than happy to take them on as business partners.

That's how 'Grounds for Thought,' came to be. It was the best bookstore and bakery/coffee shop in Forks. Okay, so it was the only one, but we stayed very busy. Once Rosalie branched out and started doing wedding cakes too, we had more business than we could handle.

As the business grew, I started feeling guilt about the fact that the bakery did a lot more business than the bookstore, so I started literature readings and poetry nights. Forks is pretty close to Port Angeles and with some marketing help, I began to draw a lot of interest from the community college there. I made sure to offer specials and do whatever it took to appeal to the collegiate crowd. It worked, and soon we had to hire employees to help with the crowd.

This was around the time that I started to feel exceptionally guilty about the fact that Andrew practically lived at the bookstore with me. He was just a baby, and at 5, he should be reading Dr. Seuss, not Bronte. So, with encouragement and promised assistance from my support group (aka mom, dad, Rose and Emmett) I signed Drew up for local group that does activities with children who have absentee fathers. Dad and Emmett try their best to give Drew a sense of male guardianship, but they have work. Not mention the fact that Rose and Emmett will have kids of their own soon.

The group turned out to be the best idea for Andrew. Soon, he was more open and excited than I had ever seen him. He would talk for hours about the things the group did and how much he loved the group 'Fathers' and 'Brothers.' They had filled a void in him that I hadn't even known existed. It took about 3 weeks before I met Drew's favorite, Mr. Mason. When I did, I could certainly understand why he would love him so much.

There is no other word for Mason Cullen but amazing. I don't know a lot about his personal life except that his wife left him about a year before he came to Forks with his dad, Carlisle. They opened a small pediatric office in town, and everyone seems to go to them. I think they even have a few patients who are _over_ 18.

As time passed, Drew and Mason grew impossibly close. I had even overheard a conversation between Carlisle and Mason about playing favorites with the boys in the group. He has made more of an effort, but it is still obvious to me.

As Drew's love for Mason grew, so did my own. I found myself sneaking glances at him and touching his arm whenever possible. I tried to be as subtle as possible, but Rose did indeed call me out a few times.

All that came to a head last Christmas. It was a spectacular Christmas Eve...followed by the most disappointing Christmas I've ever known.

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**What did you think? I plan for this to be about 4 chapters, ending on Christmas. They won't be very long, but most will be longer than this one. Be prepared, this will be so much fluff, it will make your teeth hurt! See you tomorrow!**


	2. You Gave it Away

**Hey Guys! I wish that I had gotten this out to you sooner, but I did not. This means, that I plan to give you 2 Chapter tomorrow and finish this baby up. **

**Remember I own nothing and I have no beta for this, so just enjoy as much as you can considering my comma usuage is shit. **

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_~Christmas 2011~_

"Drew, can you grab that bag of bows for Moma?" I point toward the bag of sparkles. I know this is a tricky question. On the one hand, it would be wonderful if he would hand me the bag, and I wouldn't have to get up.

On the other hand...the much more likely hand, he will probably want to play with them instead. I mean, he is only four and that is an awfully tempting bag.

I watch as he goes over, picks it up, smiles, and then takes off running. Laughing even though I know I should be reprimanding him, I give chase. I don't get to enjoy him as much as I want to with the craziness of the store.

As I hear his feet hit the bare hardwood of the living room, Mason's laugh resonates through the hall, and Drew's giggles follow soon thereafter. Mason scoops him up into his arms, and then proceeds to attack his rib cage with tickles.

"Hey, the door was open, so I just came on in," he says between fits of laughter.

As always, he was breathtaking. Watching him hold Drew so tenderly always makes my ovaries spasm.

"Yeah, I'm having a problem with the lock. The super is supposed to get it fixed." I pick the bows off of Drew's shirt. He has stuck them everywhere. That's the first thing you learn when it comes to kids. You aren't quite sure how they accomplish some things...but they do, _and_ they do it quickly.

"You know how long that can take. I'll fix it when we get back from the nursing home." Mason starts to put Drew's coat on him and I gather his bag.

The boys' group does a Christmas program at the nursing home every year. They sing carols to the residents and give them little gifts. Drew has only been with the group a few months, so this is his first time, but he is so excited.

"You don't have to do that, Mason."

"No, really, it's fine." After Mason and I get Drew bundled up and ready to go, I walk them to the door, with Drew gathered into Mason's arms.

"Have a good time baby." I lean in and kiss Drew on the head. When I start to pull back, I realize how close Mason and I are to each other. My lips part and my breaths grow heavy with anticipation. I notice Mason's tongue dart out to wet his lips, and the air sizzles with the electricity.

"Moma, we gots to go!" A little hand smacks my face.

The moment is broken and a little part of me is relieved. The bigger part is disappointed.

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When Drew first started going to activities with the boys, I tagged along. Mr. Little Independent quickly let me know after the third time, that girls weren't allowed. I spent the next few weeks scared to death and counting down the minutes until he returned. As I have gotten to know Mason, Carlisle and the other 'fathers,' I've come to appreciate the moments of peace.

I finish wrapping the gifts that I have laid out on the bed, and I'm placing them back under the tree when I hear Mason and Drew come in.

Turning to watch as Mason struggles to get in the door, I open it wide and take a bag from Mason's hand.

"Hey," Mason whispers as he packs an unconscious Drew on his shoulder.

I just smile at the beautiful sight, and then I motion for Mason to follow me. We double-team Drew as Mason works on his socks and shoes, and I take off his coat and jeans. His t-shirt is soft enough that he can sleep in it with no problem.

As we get Drew tucked in, I go to the kitchen to make Mason a cup of coffee.

I pack it out to the living room and hand it off to Mason, then take a couple bites from Santa's cookies that I brought back from the kitchen with me earlier.

"I remember how magical it seemed to find these cookies gone on Christmas morning," Mason smiles as he takes a few drinks of the milk.

I smile and think back to so many Christmas morning memories just like that one.

"My mom and dad used to put boots on the floor and sprinkle powdered sugar around them so it looked like Santa's feet prints between the fireplace and the tree," I smile at the memory and silently thank God for giving me such wonderful parents.

Putting down his now empty coffee mug, Mason pulls out a plastic bag from his coat pocket.

"Drew and I stopped off at Newton's and picked up a new knob. I hope you have a screwdriver?"

"Of course I do. What kind of Mom would I be if I didn't?" I chuckle and leave Mason kneeling on the floor with my door open.

As I dig through the utility cabinet that hangs above the washer and dryer, I finally pull out the small pink bag with all pink tools. It was a house warming gift from Mom and Dad when we moved in here.

Walking back to the living room, I notice that Mason has taken off his coat and his over shirt. I dismiss the momentary desire to see what else I could uncover.

Pulling out the Phillips screwdriver, I hand it to Mason. As he turns his head toward me and reaches up for it, a huge smile spreads across his face and his eyebrows lift.

"How very...girly, of you."

I laugh.

"Yeah, yeah. It gets the job done, right?"

He laughs and gets back to work. I spend the next few minutes filling Drew's stocking and placing his new bicycle under the tree.

A part of my heart hurts, as it has every year, knowing that Drew doesn't get to have the Christmas morning that you see in old movies. I wish I could give that to him. I wish that Alec had been a different kind of person.

"All done." Mason makes a swinging motion with the door, and he locks and unlocks it a few times.

"It should be fixed now, but if it isn't, let me know."

Smiling at him so that he knows I appreciate his hard work, I walk over to the door and open it. Twisting the handle a few times, I close the door back.

When I turn around, Mason is a lot closer to me than I realized. Our gazes immediately lock and it feels like there is a string connecting the two of us, pulling us both together.

Mason's hand reaches out and brushes my fingertips before he wraps them around my wrist. My breathing accelerates and before I can help myself, I lean into his body. His hand travels up my arm and settles on my neck.

As his head lowers toward mine, I close my eyes and wrap my arms around his neck. The soft, yet firm feel of Mason's lips on mine sends my heart into over drive and soon enough, I'm pressing into him like a shameless whore.

A soft moan escapes my chest and Mason lifts my legs, wrapping them around his waist while he pushes my body into the door. I can't help but tug at his hair with my fingers as he makes his way down, licking at my neck.

It's only moments before I feel us moving toward my bedroom, and when my back feels the soft mattress beneath me, I immediately thrust my pelvis up against his.

"God, Bella," he grits out.

My fingers reach out for his shirt, and I find myself balling the soft fabric up in the back. Helping me in my quest, Mason pulls the shirt over his chest and I nearly faint at the sight of the hard lines and soft planes beneath it. We continue kissing and I feel Mason's hands slip under the soft band of my own shirt. I want him to take it off so badly, I nearly scream the words at him. I manage to maintain my composure until the shirt is gone, but I can't wait for the bra.

I jerk it off myself.

"So beautiful," Mason murmurs under his breath before taking my nipple into his mouth.

As my pants and panties find their way down my legs, I start to scratch at Mason's zipper, begging for what is inside.

When we both finally find ourselves naked, Mason brushes my hair away and smiles down at me.

Taking my bottom lip gently into his mouth, I can feel Mason's hand gently guide himself inside me and the sensation is overwhelming. It's been nearly 3 years since I've been with a man and that was only once.

As he gently rocks against me, I can't help but thread my fingers threw his hair. All the moments of stolen glances and secret fantasies come to light and I grasp to them for dear life.

Mason's hand slowly comes down between our slick bodies and strokes at my clit, punctuated by rhythmic pinches. I recognize the signs of my orgasm and a part of me doesn't want it to be over. However, the other part, the one that is a brazen whore, thrusts my pelvis up to meet his, stroke for stroke, lick for lick.

"Baby, I'm not going hold on much longer..." Gritting his teeth, Edward's thrusts become more erratic and I slid my hand down from his shoulder to grip both his cheeks in my hands. I begin to grind against him and together we both fall over the edge, breathless and completely sated.

Blissed out and too exhausted to move, I curl up against Edward and he holds me close to his chest, kissing my neck.

I drift off to sleep and think about how this is the best Christmas I've had in a long time.

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"Mommy!"

The bedroom door slings open and Andrew jumps on the bed.

I immediately grab for the sheet, and I pull it up against my naked body. Quickly glancing beside me, I realize that the bed is cold and Mason is no where to be found. My lady parts are sad for this fact, but the Mommy part of me is glad.

"Santa came! Santa came!" Drew bounces off the bed and takes off running back into the living room.

The guilt is automatically overwhelming. I've never gone back on my promise to myself that Andrew came first. Until today.

Quickly jumping from under the covers and wrapping myself in my robe, I head toward the kitchen to grab a cup of coffee. As I make my way through, I realize that Mason had turned the tree on and set the coffee pot. These little touches are sweet, but it's the sight of the powdered sugar footprints that nearly undoes my resolve.

Carlisle invited the group over to his house for Christmas dinner tonight, and while most of the families have prior arrangements, Andrew and I will be going. Hopefully, I can talk to Mason then. I have so many things I want to say to him.

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Dinner is delicious. I expect nothing less from Esme Cullen. A former party planner, she knows all there is to know about how to throw a bash. I haven't seen Mason or Andrew very much during the entire celebration. Andrew attacked him as soon as we walked in the door, and he has been attached to his hip ever since.

As the party finally starts to dwindle, I get my first chance to come face to face with Mason.

"Hey, how are you?" I ask with my voice full of excitement. I have thought about last night all day, and I have so much I want to tell him. I mean, I realize that it will be a challenge, and that we must make sure to take Andrew into careful consideration. With any other guy, I wouldn't even consider it, but with Mason, it's like all my dreams are coming true.

"Fine. You?" Mason barely looks at me, instead concerning himself with cleaning Andrew's face from the chocolate dessert he just ate.

"I'm great. It was a lovely party, make sure to tell your Mom, will you?" I start to reach toward Mason's arm, but he immediately withdrawals

"Hey Drew. I know that Dad has a special present under the tree, just for you. Why don't you run in there and find it. Your mom and I will be right in, okay?"

Mason barely has the words out of his mouth before Andrew is running toward the sitting room, full speed.

Turning back to me, I already see the words in Mason's eyes. Disappoint floods my veins and I struggle to contain the tears that burn just below the surface.

"Bella, look..."

"It's okay, Mason. I get it." The last thing I want it to ruin a relationship that my son has grown so dependent on. I should have thought of that before last night.

"Bella, it's just that..."

"It's okay, Mason. Really." I smile and turn toward the living room before my smile falls.

"Are you sure?" He seems genuine and I can't be mad at him. Just because I read more into the situation than he did isn't his fault.

As I head toward the room where I can hear my son's laughs and chatter, I'm happy that I didn't pour out my heart to Mason. That is the last thing I need this Christmas.

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**Hope you liked it. I'm off to bed, Santa is coming to my house tonight, what about you?**


	3. Author's Note

As you can tell, this isn't a new chapter. I've been holding off on finishing this story because I have been trying to decide what to do with it. I had talked to a friend about my desire to do a daily drabble. She suggested that I turn this story into that. I've held off on updating this for that reason, and now I've decided that is what I am going to do.

I wanted to give you a heads up that I'm going to pull this in the next few days. I'm hoping to wrap up THS in the next month and a half or so. After that, I will be starting a new multi-chapter fic. I would like to turn this into a drabble that would post daily for the month or so in between stories.

I'm sorry if this is bad news to any of you, but I feel like this plot is actually a pretty good idea for a drabble and I invite you to put me on author alert so that you can see why Edward was a douche after their one night stand.

Hope to see you soon!


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